Wow! What a subject to write upon. It is one of those Hot subjects in this world, after International Space Station, and flashy break up of Hollywood stars and USA finding where Bin laden is and having an party.
Yes, Meditation is one of those very simple , but yet very complex states and all the more research and curiosity to find out what it is all about. Even more interesting is, the evolution of the so called "New Age" way of life, with marriage of Yoga and Meditation, sipping chai from East and eating vegetarian food and chanting the universal vibration "OM", wearing a pashmina shawl from Kashmir and attending one of those very expensive spiritual retreats in India, or in USA, or in some really exotic locations of Hawaii and Bahamas. Sometimes I feel these groups are ripping people apart in the name of 'New Age' concept of life. Whatever we all call "New Age", had existed a few thousands of years ago and it could be as old as the universe itself. The Age Old Universe, tries to maintain the perfect balance with this "Old Age" way of life style and Meditation.
Meditation, as we all know in the western world, is mostly related to Buddha, who is shown to be sitting in a very simple yogic posture called "Padma asana", like a lotus flower, with his closed eyes, and his mood, seems to reflect the one of the cosmic silence, a deep contemplation and that of acceptance and letting things come and go. No attachment to anything.
Is that Meditation? How does one achieve that? Can every one become Buddha? Should every one try to attain the Buddha state? Is Meditation, Celibacy? Is Meditation, Vegetarianism? Is Meditation, Nonviolence? What would happen to world, If everyone is meditating like Buddha, and there would be no procreation, For, Buddha, had gone into the meditation after he had enjoyed all riches in the world and had created progeny. So, Is Meditation, something that one has to adopt after one finishes the procreation process? Is it something where you go to Jungles and sit in silence away from society? If the whole world is filled with Buddhas, then what about Bill Gates, what about Tom Cruises, what about Aishwarya Rais and what about Tiger Woods.
Before we go any deeper, let's check the meaning of Meditation in the famous Oxford or Webster Dictionary, it means "To Contemplate". Wow! that sounds simple, to contemplate, anyone can do it. True it is, anyone can do it.
Infact we are all born in that perfectly meditative state. When we are in Mother's womb, we are meditating, just happy with the food that Mommy provides through the umbilical cord.
Even until a few years after the birth, we are in that meditative state, just observing everything around and silently watching everything come and go.
So seems like, we have this skill in all of us. Yes, we are, We all have it within us. We do not have to run to Himalayas, or we do not have to practice celibacy, nor we do not have to turn vegetarians to be meditative. Meditation is just a state of mind.
As we grow up, in this material world, there are lot of distractions, that some times can put us through a roller coaster ride, We tend to loose control over ourselves, our emotions and our own thought process. This can lead to the miseries of the life. It is like a Train traveling on the track, as long as Train is traveling at a certain speed limit we all enjoy the ride, but the moment the speed crosses a certain limit, it looses track and derails and Boom! Damage happens.
Why is Meditation stressed upon so much these days, of all the times in the history of mankind. Because, with the advent of science and technology, life has fast paced quite a bit. Interestingly the end means of Science and Technology revolution should help mankind to perform better and live more comfortably and happily, helping us manage our body and mind better, in tough situations and in accomplishing our day to day tasks. But contrary to that, Life has become for many of us, a vicious circle, because we started to become slaves to the speed. Speed is essential, but too much speed can cause the Train of Human Life derail. The speed at which these thoughts come and bog down the mind, body and soul can be pretty detrimental to the health, both physical and mental.
So what does Meditation do in such cases? It helps us to slow down and observe. It helps us to watch everything around us. It helps us to watch without becoming victim of our own thoughts. It helps us not to fall into the vicious circle of Speed. It helps us to choose our thoughts. It helps us to be very selective about which thoughts we want to put into action. It is natural that we humans based on the environment and circumstances are subject to myriad thoughts, and probably because of Karma too. More to do with the modernization of world with TV, Cinema, Print Media, Internet and free access to everything from information about how to reach moon, how to fire a nuclear missile, to availability of drugs, to open sex, to free access to individuals and groups of all kinds. With so much information going across human mind, it can be pretty strenuous and hard to process and digest all that data. Like a computer that is overloaded with too many processes and threads running, it can crash.
Apart from the speed, we all go through both Negative and Positive thoughts and emotions. Even Buddha or Gandhi was no exception to this. Everyone is a human. But when we slow down and observe, there is a good possibility for us to choose the positive thoughts over the negative ones that can bog us down.
Meditation is letting your inner self be in control, rather than some external force or environment control us. It gives more control, to make better decisions. So how do we achieve this? How do we get to control thoughts? Simple, sitting and closing your eyes for a short time, may be 30 minutes in the morning after you wake up and 30 minutes in the night before hitting bed. Simple it is. But we hear many people saying "Oh, I do not have that time. I am too busy for that". Well, that is a sign of trouble, People who say that they are too busy for simple things are actually on the path to derail. Busy to the extent that it does not give time to sit for 30 min . a day for your well being is a very bad state of affairs to be in.
Alright, so what happens in the process of this sitting for 30 minutes? Not much actually. God is not going to come and bless you with a Benz car or a vacation in exotic location. But sure at the end of 30 min, you would feel the comfort of driving in the most comfortable car in the world and relaxing in the most exotic location in the world. Wow! Not a bad deal, every day we get to experience this even without going and doing these in reality.
Initially the 30 minutes might feel like a decade, because we are not used to doing this, we feel like opening our eyes and going and doing something, that is Anxiety. But slowly, day after day, we get better control. There is no need to imagine a light, no need to think of an angel or a God, Just close eyes and let all the thoughts come and go. Just, become an observer of your own thoughts. Interestingly after a few minutes all the thoughts fade off. That is It!! This is a state of Nirvana, or Samadhi as they call it in ancient texts. The state where we become one with the universe. This state is very addictive, more addictive than your chocolate cake or Steak or Butter Chicken.
In this process, we are letting ourselves get in touch with inner self, the so called "Soul". This does not mean that Mind is bad. I hear many people saying Mind is vicious and Soul is pure. Everything in this universal creation is pure and beautiful. From Amoeba, to AIDS virus, to a Rose flower, to Human Mind, everything is part of this creation and has a reason for their existence.
The process of meditation just helps to keep this beautiful mind in good control. It is like recharging the mind, Every day we brush our teeth, we take bath, clean our bowls and wash our clothes. But are we doing anything for cleaning our minds, NO. Meditation is a process that helps in removing that stagnated crap in the folds of brain.
Have u ever heard that the most melodious music is actually the silence between the nodes, It is the pauses and silence between 2 nodes that gives the music a soothening and melodious effect. Take a guitar and string it continuously for 5 minutes without any gap between the strokes. And now take the same guitar and string it slowly with short gaps between each stroke, there comes the melody. You will notice it yourself. Same with Mind, when it is continuously bombarded by thoughts it becomes jarring, but when the thoughts are controlled and spaced, we hear the song of mind, the silence between those thoughts is where the 'song of soul' is. That song is the connection between the physical body on earth and the universal energy that spins this universe. Taking time to get in touch with Soul is Meditation. What is Soul? That is pretty big word suddenly? Well, we shall dive deep into it in the next article. Till then keep meditating.
Once we start doing this every day, the mind starts seeing things slowly and observes everything, and chooses the right thing and makes correct decisions, correct decisions in the sense, the decisions for the benefit of mankind, to make a positive difference in this world.
Meditation, is a way of life, It is something that has to become part of life. There is no need to run away from the material world to meditate. Sitting in the comfort of your own bed and couch, this can be done. Yes, the reason people want to be got to jungles and mountains, is, there is less disturbance there, there are few things to distract the process, we are more close to nature, so these places help and make it easier. But we cannot expect all of us to live in Forest rest of the life time.
The same state can be achieved by sitting calmly by closing the eyes for 30 min every morning and night.
In the beginning not every one can do this. It is hard to sit for 30 min with eyes closed. So we have developed other ways of meditating like, focusing on candle light, listening to music, repeating chants, and using idol worship, all these just some supporting elements to draw us inside and see ourselves. Over a period of time, it is better to remove these crutches and take support from within our inner self.
Meditation helps us to see everything very clearly, without bias and sometimes extremely judgmental attitude. It creates the space within ourselves to create what we want. It is a backbone for visualization process through which we can plan and create everything we want in life. It is a process of developing compassion towards this universe, the universe inside and outside. Over a period of time we realize that "We are Universe". The Soul is just a drop of the universal spirit with a structure around in form of blood and flesh. This is what we call "Spiritual Beings". Yes, we all are. Spirituality is not about wearing an orange, white or a black robe, or abandoning samsaric (family life) life, or becoming vegetarian or practicing celibacy or preaching religion. Religion has nothing to do with Meditation. Religion is about saying,"I belong to such and such group of people who practise these things". But, Meditation is about becoming one with nature, with everything and everyone around. It is about being in touch with that universe within and outside.
Meditation is the only solution to the chaos happening this world. Meditation, is something that should be incorporated and make it a practice in schools and education institutions. Along with other subjects every day there should be a class for 30min, "Meditation class". This definitely will strengthen the kids as they grow up to handle the changes in their emotional states and also the outside world very well. It develops in them, Acceptance for themselves and everyone else. Parents should start cultivating this habit from the childhood to prepare their kids for the challenges of future.
Meditate and be in touch with your inner self. Buddha is within all of us. Buddha is a state of mind. Calm, quite and serene. Then, we all end up seeing the world through the same lens, Lens of Meditation.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Friday, November 10, 2006
Cosmic Purification
A seed sown in soil after interacting with the elements of nature and then going through Darwin’s check “Survival of the fittest”, and then starts to grow as a little plant, into a shrub and finally a tree. This tree takes all the brunt of nature in form of floods, earthquakes, fires, and human intervention. Apart from reaping the benefits of nature like getting air for free, water for free, soil for free it produces a beautiful flower, a tasty fruit or a nice and magnificent landscape.
If Trees had brains, they would have questioned a million times during their life time, during this endurance, during this “Suffering”, a very deceptive word coined by humans “Why is it me that has to undergo so much?”, “Why is it me to take all the brunt of nature and still produce the best for the other children of Mother Nature?” But see, the Tree, never ever thinks, why it has to go through the so-called ‘Suffering’.
An embryo is formed in the mother’s womb, from a single cell, multiple cells are formed and then from there a fetus and then a complete form, just like we all call them “babies”. How much did that mother endure to create a baby? How much did the baby suffer through to grow in the minimal space available hardly enough for it to move across, hardly enough to stretch in the evenings? The same baby after going through a process of changes comes out into this world after a process rightly named as “Labor”. The same baby when it is ready to eat, talk, walk, run, goes through so many tough stages, falls many times and gets up and again walks. But never ever complains about the falls, never see these things as sufferings. It views those sufferings as foot steps of its survival, as a process through which it reaches next level in life, to become better and do better. But we adults as we grow up, start using our mind in a way that we start viewing this process of evolution and learning in a negative manner, cribbing and complaining about life.
The most precious metal in this world for which every human soul on every corner of earth had waged wars, destroyed kingdoms, crossed the toughest nature barriers, The Gold, was and is never available as Pure Gold in nature. It’s original form called, “Ore”, has to undergo so many transformations to reach its final destiny to beautify people and places. It undergoes and suffers through temperatures beyond imagination, the hurdles it has to cross, the hits it had to take to mould and finally shine and glow to glorify the beauty of many things.
Every element in the lap of Mother Nature has to go through the so called “suffering”, which we better call “Purification”.
There is nothing called "suffering" in this world. Every element in this world has to undergo purification to reach the stage where one is being useful for many more and more and more around in the nature and then at the end of the life to liberate themselves, to rest in peace when we leave this planet, to liberate the indomitable human soul, to reach the gates of heaven if one exists. Some people attain this purification very earlier in life, some people take time to attain that state, and some people wait a life-time to get there, but every soul that is born gets there at some point or the other. It has to indeed, that is how cosmic energy designed this universe and its elements.
Take another example, Birth of a Star, it forms from particles of dust, it takes millions of years to grow to a size and start liberating the purity in form of light and energy for other elements of universe. These stars before falling back into the nature, or before dying and exploding shine and shine and finally serve their purpose of giving light to this cosmos.The secrets of creation are many, not understood by many, but we all are subject to the processes involved in creation, we all are just another element, part of this universe, that need to go through the same process of purification like a Star, a Plant, and Gold.
We all are born as human beings with very less intelligence. Babies are pure and innocent; there is no mental process in them. Is there a baby in this world that is not innocent? That is an un-defying fact. But can it serve any one, can it reach another element in nature, Can it be of use to some one. It is like a little plant just sprouting out of a seed. It has a lot do as it grows up. Babies grow up to be Adults, and finally to Old age. Nature has designed these stages to go through what we called “Purification”, not suffering. The interesting part is that once the purification process is done and the human elements that survive this process reach a state of innocence again. Remember last time some one saying “Kids and Old People are very similar”. Yes, humans come innocent and leave innocent. Nature brings every baby into this universe with innocence to serve a purpose by becoming pure and spread the light and finally ripen and fall back into its lap.Every purification process is different, like different metal ores need different levels of temperatures and temperament to undergo purification. We all go through different forms of purification too.
When a human is going through this process of purification there is not much other humans can do, like giving suggestions, advices and teachings. In fact they can only disrupt the process of purification and lead to unwanted results like hatred, anger, frustration and in some severe cases depression and leading to end their lives. This does not serve any purpose.It stops the purification that one has to go through. These advices and lessons from others can only be hurdle for that soul going through purification. The only thing other humans can do as part of this process of purification is to stand up and say “I am there for you”, because in the process of purification, human mind is churned, and the soul undergoes the process of transformation. Provide a support system for the people who are going through purification process. Pat on the back and give them a shoulder to lean on.
Purification process is a self evolving process, the purification has to happen from within, not from outside, not by force, not by repeating some religious chants a million times with thoughts some where else, not by reading a religious text, not by visiting a religious place every day with worries, But, by surrendering ourselves, our egos to the supreme and getting in touch with our souls. By bowing down in front of mother nature and immersing our souls like a metal ore that goes back into the core of the furnace to get purified. The moment we surrender to the Supreme, and just become observers, we attain the state of eternal peace. A prayer with pure love does that. A person who reaches the top of Mount Everest bows kneels down and bows down to the Mother Nature and surrenders everything.
Every human element takes their time, to surrender the ego, the anger, the anxiety, the materialistic views, and the negative thoughts. The moment we do that, we become conscious of everything. The judgment of good and bad, pain and joy disappears. The sense of attachment is lost. We become on with the universe. We start to glow bright as a star, as luminous as Gold and can bear only the sweetest of the sweet fruits like a Tree, for serving the humanity. Then humans realize the purpose of their life, serving the fellow humans with Love, and giving care, spreading peace to everyone and everything in nature.
Isn’t it time to remove the word “Suffer” from Emotional Dictionary? For sure, Nature would give that call when human intelligence crosses limits to destroy themselves. Nature is more powerful than any of the elements that are part of their creation.
Doesn’t the mother know how to handle its kids better, than any one in this world, for there is nothing more powerful in this universe than the Process of Creation and Creator itself, it is self contained, it is self generating and it is self dependent. Our minds are as dangerous, and beautiful as they are.
Let's start using this positive word called “Purification”, rather than a depressing and negative word “Suffering”.
We are all part of a positive evolutionary process. Universe wants all of its elements to grow, shine and give light. We are all the stars of the universe.
At last No Mother ever wants its kids to suffer, it only wants them to get better and better and purer and purer.
If Trees had brains, they would have questioned a million times during their life time, during this endurance, during this “Suffering”, a very deceptive word coined by humans “Why is it me that has to undergo so much?”, “Why is it me to take all the brunt of nature and still produce the best for the other children of Mother Nature?” But see, the Tree, never ever thinks, why it has to go through the so-called ‘Suffering’.
An embryo is formed in the mother’s womb, from a single cell, multiple cells are formed and then from there a fetus and then a complete form, just like we all call them “babies”. How much did that mother endure to create a baby? How much did the baby suffer through to grow in the minimal space available hardly enough for it to move across, hardly enough to stretch in the evenings? The same baby after going through a process of changes comes out into this world after a process rightly named as “Labor”. The same baby when it is ready to eat, talk, walk, run, goes through so many tough stages, falls many times and gets up and again walks. But never ever complains about the falls, never see these things as sufferings. It views those sufferings as foot steps of its survival, as a process through which it reaches next level in life, to become better and do better. But we adults as we grow up, start using our mind in a way that we start viewing this process of evolution and learning in a negative manner, cribbing and complaining about life.
The most precious metal in this world for which every human soul on every corner of earth had waged wars, destroyed kingdoms, crossed the toughest nature barriers, The Gold, was and is never available as Pure Gold in nature. It’s original form called, “Ore”, has to undergo so many transformations to reach its final destiny to beautify people and places. It undergoes and suffers through temperatures beyond imagination, the hurdles it has to cross, the hits it had to take to mould and finally shine and glow to glorify the beauty of many things.
Every element in the lap of Mother Nature has to go through the so called “suffering”, which we better call “Purification”.
There is nothing called "suffering" in this world. Every element in this world has to undergo purification to reach the stage where one is being useful for many more and more and more around in the nature and then at the end of the life to liberate themselves, to rest in peace when we leave this planet, to liberate the indomitable human soul, to reach the gates of heaven if one exists. Some people attain this purification very earlier in life, some people take time to attain that state, and some people wait a life-time to get there, but every soul that is born gets there at some point or the other. It has to indeed, that is how cosmic energy designed this universe and its elements.
Take another example, Birth of a Star, it forms from particles of dust, it takes millions of years to grow to a size and start liberating the purity in form of light and energy for other elements of universe. These stars before falling back into the nature, or before dying and exploding shine and shine and finally serve their purpose of giving light to this cosmos.The secrets of creation are many, not understood by many, but we all are subject to the processes involved in creation, we all are just another element, part of this universe, that need to go through the same process of purification like a Star, a Plant, and Gold.
We all are born as human beings with very less intelligence. Babies are pure and innocent; there is no mental process in them. Is there a baby in this world that is not innocent? That is an un-defying fact. But can it serve any one, can it reach another element in nature, Can it be of use to some one. It is like a little plant just sprouting out of a seed. It has a lot do as it grows up. Babies grow up to be Adults, and finally to Old age. Nature has designed these stages to go through what we called “Purification”, not suffering. The interesting part is that once the purification process is done and the human elements that survive this process reach a state of innocence again. Remember last time some one saying “Kids and Old People are very similar”. Yes, humans come innocent and leave innocent. Nature brings every baby into this universe with innocence to serve a purpose by becoming pure and spread the light and finally ripen and fall back into its lap.Every purification process is different, like different metal ores need different levels of temperatures and temperament to undergo purification. We all go through different forms of purification too.
When a human is going through this process of purification there is not much other humans can do, like giving suggestions, advices and teachings. In fact they can only disrupt the process of purification and lead to unwanted results like hatred, anger, frustration and in some severe cases depression and leading to end their lives. This does not serve any purpose.It stops the purification that one has to go through. These advices and lessons from others can only be hurdle for that soul going through purification. The only thing other humans can do as part of this process of purification is to stand up and say “I am there for you”, because in the process of purification, human mind is churned, and the soul undergoes the process of transformation. Provide a support system for the people who are going through purification process. Pat on the back and give them a shoulder to lean on.
Purification process is a self evolving process, the purification has to happen from within, not from outside, not by force, not by repeating some religious chants a million times with thoughts some where else, not by reading a religious text, not by visiting a religious place every day with worries, But, by surrendering ourselves, our egos to the supreme and getting in touch with our souls. By bowing down in front of mother nature and immersing our souls like a metal ore that goes back into the core of the furnace to get purified. The moment we surrender to the Supreme, and just become observers, we attain the state of eternal peace. A prayer with pure love does that. A person who reaches the top of Mount Everest bows kneels down and bows down to the Mother Nature and surrenders everything.
Every human element takes their time, to surrender the ego, the anger, the anxiety, the materialistic views, and the negative thoughts. The moment we do that, we become conscious of everything. The judgment of good and bad, pain and joy disappears. The sense of attachment is lost. We become on with the universe. We start to glow bright as a star, as luminous as Gold and can bear only the sweetest of the sweet fruits like a Tree, for serving the humanity. Then humans realize the purpose of their life, serving the fellow humans with Love, and giving care, spreading peace to everyone and everything in nature.
Isn’t it time to remove the word “Suffer” from Emotional Dictionary? For sure, Nature would give that call when human intelligence crosses limits to destroy themselves. Nature is more powerful than any of the elements that are part of their creation.
Doesn’t the mother know how to handle its kids better, than any one in this world, for there is nothing more powerful in this universe than the Process of Creation and Creator itself, it is self contained, it is self generating and it is self dependent. Our minds are as dangerous, and beautiful as they are.
Let's start using this positive word called “Purification”, rather than a depressing and negative word “Suffering”.
We are all part of a positive evolutionary process. Universe wants all of its elements to grow, shine and give light. We are all the stars of the universe.
At last No Mother ever wants its kids to suffer, it only wants them to get better and better and purer and purer.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Are Marriages made in Heaven?
Marriage is just a simple word that we have created for social convenience. In its true sense, it is just 2 people living together for a good company and possibly learn and discover life and be there for each other to lean on in tough times in the adventure. These 2 people lived happily and fine even before the marriage.
If we see a little more deeply into this, a person was living with positive attitude and reached pinnacle in terms of career and personality and he or she is already contributing to family and system before marriage. But why do most of the people complain about marriage.
So when 2 people come together under one roof, Happiness and Joy probably should multiply and become more positive, and in turn more contribution to the society. Everything should double up. But in most of the cases, why do we end up seeing it going in the negative direction, people struggling and losing peace of mind, ending up in turmoil and pain, forcing each other into their erroneous zones, domination and finger pointing.
One quick solution to avoid some of these issues, is to know the person a litle bit more before entering into a relationship. Because, some times, when two people are coming from 2 totally different, cultural, habitual and idealogical background and who are not willing to understand each other's perspectives, it can pretty much become a War Zone. Frankly, no two individuals are the same. Each of them is unique in a certain way. So we got to have some other way of making marriages work then. What is that Magic?
Marriage is a simple equation, "1 + 1 = 2". So when we add 2 things it should increase every thing in a positive way. Infact let's take a deeper look into the equation itself.
The first '1' in the equation represents "Space" and the second '1' represents "Acceptance". These 2 elements are crucial in a relationship. We keep talking about Love and other values, they are all important too, But more importantly Love should lead to the inner feel of Acceptance.
Of course it has to be from both sides. One side Acceptance leads to frustration at some point. That becomes only Adjustment. Marriage is not an adjustment, it is Acceptance.
Giving Space for each other is also very essential. As changes are natural in one's personality and situations, Space allows the other person to adjust to those new personality changes and circumstances outside home. We also have inherent fears and insecurities and these need lot of space and time to dissolve. In an ideal relationship we tenderly allow them to disappear and all this happens with the 2 magic words "Space and Acceptance". We need people doing more self introspection and go a little more deeper into the sense of marriage. Marriage is a Privelege, it is not a Right.
Marriages can be "Heaven on Earth", but it needs understanding and a positive approach from both sides. The people involved need simple things like lot of listening, silence, and observation skills with a compassionate apparoach.
And finally to conclude, Once Swami Vivekananda was siting near a pond and a woman came next to him and asked him, "Swami, what is a marriage?"
Swami took some water in his palm and held it delicately trying to not let the water go away from palm and replied to her "This is marriage".
The woman laughed and asked "what do you mean this marriage? just that water".
Swami replied "If u hold the water too tight by closing your fingers, it will go away. If you keep your fingers loose, the water will drip off. But u need to hold it so sensibly and delicately that it stays" .
If we see a little more deeply into this, a person was living with positive attitude and reached pinnacle in terms of career and personality and he or she is already contributing to family and system before marriage. But why do most of the people complain about marriage.
So when 2 people come together under one roof, Happiness and Joy probably should multiply and become more positive, and in turn more contribution to the society. Everything should double up. But in most of the cases, why do we end up seeing it going in the negative direction, people struggling and losing peace of mind, ending up in turmoil and pain, forcing each other into their erroneous zones, domination and finger pointing.
One quick solution to avoid some of these issues, is to know the person a litle bit more before entering into a relationship. Because, some times, when two people are coming from 2 totally different, cultural, habitual and idealogical background and who are not willing to understand each other's perspectives, it can pretty much become a War Zone. Frankly, no two individuals are the same. Each of them is unique in a certain way. So we got to have some other way of making marriages work then. What is that Magic?
Marriage is a simple equation, "1 + 1 = 2". So when we add 2 things it should increase every thing in a positive way. Infact let's take a deeper look into the equation itself.
The first '1' in the equation represents "Space" and the second '1' represents "Acceptance". These 2 elements are crucial in a relationship. We keep talking about Love and other values, they are all important too, But more importantly Love should lead to the inner feel of Acceptance.
Of course it has to be from both sides. One side Acceptance leads to frustration at some point. That becomes only Adjustment. Marriage is not an adjustment, it is Acceptance.
Giving Space for each other is also very essential. As changes are natural in one's personality and situations, Space allows the other person to adjust to those new personality changes and circumstances outside home. We also have inherent fears and insecurities and these need lot of space and time to dissolve. In an ideal relationship we tenderly allow them to disappear and all this happens with the 2 magic words "Space and Acceptance". We need people doing more self introspection and go a little more deeper into the sense of marriage. Marriage is a Privelege, it is not a Right.
Marriages can be "Heaven on Earth", but it needs understanding and a positive approach from both sides. The people involved need simple things like lot of listening, silence, and observation skills with a compassionate apparoach.
And finally to conclude, Once Swami Vivekananda was siting near a pond and a woman came next to him and asked him, "Swami, what is a marriage?"
Swami took some water in his palm and held it delicately trying to not let the water go away from palm and replied to her "This is marriage".
The woman laughed and asked "what do you mean this marriage? just that water".
Swami replied "If u hold the water too tight by closing your fingers, it will go away. If you keep your fingers loose, the water will drip off. But u need to hold it so sensibly and delicately that it stays" .
Monday, November 06, 2006
Polarities of Life
We all at some point or the other, go through this phase where we are trying to judge, some thing as Good and Bad. We say this person is nice and the other is not nice. We also tend to judge everything around us, beautiful and ugly, tasty and disgusting, fragrant and stinky. But the fact is that Polarities are just the result of human analysis and conclusions, nor do they really exist, nor they are a standard. Go to Japan or some Eastern country, and check the menu, people eat snakes and dogs. Well, for a person going from America or Europe, that might look really nasty, But then, it is just merely a perception of mind. It is just that this person is not used to it and cannot take the smell of it.
We hate the person whom we love, and again we love the person we hate some times.
Judgments are mere superficial perceptions of people's minds.
So, Do Polarities really exist?
The fact is, North and South poles are just mere creations of a Human mind, in reality they do not exist, we defined it for ourselves. Is there a North or South for Universe?
Do we know if Universe has dimensions, like a Square or a circle, or a Rectangle?
All these are our perceptions?
Love and Hatred, North and South, Good and Bad, are two different sides of the same coin. They origin from the same place and they are part if the same thing.
It is like Saddam Hussain was a friend of USA long time back and an enemy now. It is like India and Pakistan were together as one country in the history, but they are in war in recent times. All created by the human mind.
Polarity is a Myth. Universe is the Truth.
We hate the person whom we love, and again we love the person we hate some times.
Judgments are mere superficial perceptions of people's minds.
So, Do Polarities really exist?
The fact is, North and South poles are just mere creations of a Human mind, in reality they do not exist, we defined it for ourselves. Is there a North or South for Universe?
Do we know if Universe has dimensions, like a Square or a circle, or a Rectangle?
All these are our perceptions?
Love and Hatred, North and South, Good and Bad, are two different sides of the same coin. They origin from the same place and they are part if the same thing.
It is like Saddam Hussain was a friend of USA long time back and an enemy now. It is like India and Pakistan were together as one country in the history, but they are in war in recent times. All created by the human mind.
Polarity is a Myth. Universe is the Truth.
Change your Lens
Life was and is an interesting journey. It teaches so many things as long as we are ready to slow down, observe and learn.
Many times there is conflict between us and the world around. That turmoil is actually within and, all the problems are in us. We see the world through those problems and experiences and form our own image of the world. If a person actually loves himself a lot, there is lot of love flowing through the thoughts. Everything around also looks loving and beautiful. Once he is accepting everything of himself completely, he accepts everything outside.
We have good and bad in all of us, But this person is accepting completely everything inside that exists. The Bad can be fixed once we are aware of that. How can one be aware of them? Only when we look inside and find them, both Good and Bad. Retain the Good and strengthen it and throw the bad. The moment we accept ourselves completely, BANG! We have no problems and painful experiences in us. When that happens, The Magic begins. Because, we are actually in love with our selves and our inner self. The feeling of Love and acceptance is what we are going to see the world with.
So we are now using the Lens of "Love and Acceptance" to see the world. We start accepting everyone around. You look at them and smile and walk. So, ACCEPT YOURSELF first, Fall in Love with your own creation and that feeling of Love lingers in the mind and soul which can be extended to the rest of the world.
Most of the times, we are in conflict with the world, people and circumstances around us. We hate some things and some people, and do not like their presence and we want to get away from them. Natural. But also to realize that world is made up of variety is also very essential. Just look at the whole food chain and natural evolution. We cannot say, “Only Lions can exist in the forest”, or “only beautiful Peacocks should be in the forest”. Nor we can say, 'we do not want Foxes and Hyenas and Vultures'. They all exist together and serve their purpose. Deer, cannot say "I hate lions". In such case, Lions would perish. That is Nature's creation, We accept it. Of course the Deer try to run and some survive and some perish. All part of the game of Life and Nature.
Most of us who say "I am suffering" actually are referring to lack of happiness and peace. The other day when I watched a Program on Dalai Lama, he was agreeing to the fact that the happiest people are the ones who are coming from poor classes of society. So the other people who are suffering around are actually not suffering because of lack of food, shelter or clothing. They are suffering because they are not happy, they are not at peace.
They are not at peace with themselves, with their minds and the vicious circle of meaningless desires
Interestingly, Peace is inherent in us. Every human is born in peace. Every child is considered a descendant of God’s blessing. As we grow up, we ignore that tender soul in us, and we are fighting with ourselves. Instead of going inside and finding our inner self and be in touch with our soul, we are looking for answers every where and pointing fingers and saying, "I do not like this, I hate them, I cannot stand this group. I cannot live with this person" and keep creating frustration or so called Negation state of mind and energy. In this process we have created a lens of negativity in front of our minds and anything we see in this world appears with the color of lens.
All our perceptions are just the experiences through which we watch the world. At least, most of the time, that is what we do. But the moment we get away from those experiences, we see things clearly not only outside, more importantly inside ourselves. Once we clearly see our inner self, accept that soul within all of us, we see that outside world also becomes beautiful, it is serene, calm and peaceful. Once we feel good about ourselves, we feel good every where, because our lenses are clean and clear now. No more influences. We start becoming immune to the surroundings and circumstances. This is typically a state of Yogi or a Saint, who can go beyond any polarities of life.
But, How does one accept oneself amidst, all the environmental influences, chaos from home, school, society. Everyone is trying to rub their philosophy on you. They want you to be their way, They like u only if u do things their way. That is where all the toughness is, that is the BIGGEST BARRIER, It is like a huge pile of mountain and u need to melt that mountain to find your real self and then you get to accept yourself.
But how do you find your real self and face it.
The secret for this is "MEDITATION".
The people who are happy, are the ones, who accept themselves first. That does not mean that they are correct. Right or Wrong are relative. For Deer, A Lion is wrong. For a Lion, Elephant can be wrong. But whatever they are, they are all part of creation. The same creation created me, you, and them too. So No Questions about existence. It is the Law of Nature.
The moment we accept ourselves, we are at peace and the moment we are at peace, we smile at everything. But it is a very easy and hard journey. It takes time and effort. Search for happiness and peace is within, never outside. So, Change the Lens now.
Next article we shall see what truly is Meditation. Until then keep accepting yourself...and see the world through a new lens.
Many times there is conflict between us and the world around. That turmoil is actually within and, all the problems are in us. We see the world through those problems and experiences and form our own image of the world. If a person actually loves himself a lot, there is lot of love flowing through the thoughts. Everything around also looks loving and beautiful. Once he is accepting everything of himself completely, he accepts everything outside.
We have good and bad in all of us, But this person is accepting completely everything inside that exists. The Bad can be fixed once we are aware of that. How can one be aware of them? Only when we look inside and find them, both Good and Bad. Retain the Good and strengthen it and throw the bad. The moment we accept ourselves completely, BANG! We have no problems and painful experiences in us. When that happens, The Magic begins. Because, we are actually in love with our selves and our inner self. The feeling of Love and acceptance is what we are going to see the world with.
So we are now using the Lens of "Love and Acceptance" to see the world. We start accepting everyone around. You look at them and smile and walk. So, ACCEPT YOURSELF first, Fall in Love with your own creation and that feeling of Love lingers in the mind and soul which can be extended to the rest of the world.
Most of the times, we are in conflict with the world, people and circumstances around us. We hate some things and some people, and do not like their presence and we want to get away from them. Natural. But also to realize that world is made up of variety is also very essential. Just look at the whole food chain and natural evolution. We cannot say, “Only Lions can exist in the forest”, or “only beautiful Peacocks should be in the forest”. Nor we can say, 'we do not want Foxes and Hyenas and Vultures'. They all exist together and serve their purpose. Deer, cannot say "I hate lions". In such case, Lions would perish. That is Nature's creation, We accept it. Of course the Deer try to run and some survive and some perish. All part of the game of Life and Nature.
Most of us who say "I am suffering" actually are referring to lack of happiness and peace. The other day when I watched a Program on Dalai Lama, he was agreeing to the fact that the happiest people are the ones who are coming from poor classes of society. So the other people who are suffering around are actually not suffering because of lack of food, shelter or clothing. They are suffering because they are not happy, they are not at peace.
They are not at peace with themselves, with their minds and the vicious circle of meaningless desires
Interestingly, Peace is inherent in us. Every human is born in peace. Every child is considered a descendant of God’s blessing. As we grow up, we ignore that tender soul in us, and we are fighting with ourselves. Instead of going inside and finding our inner self and be in touch with our soul, we are looking for answers every where and pointing fingers and saying, "I do not like this, I hate them, I cannot stand this group. I cannot live with this person" and keep creating frustration or so called Negation state of mind and energy. In this process we have created a lens of negativity in front of our minds and anything we see in this world appears with the color of lens.
All our perceptions are just the experiences through which we watch the world. At least, most of the time, that is what we do. But the moment we get away from those experiences, we see things clearly not only outside, more importantly inside ourselves. Once we clearly see our inner self, accept that soul within all of us, we see that outside world also becomes beautiful, it is serene, calm and peaceful. Once we feel good about ourselves, we feel good every where, because our lenses are clean and clear now. No more influences. We start becoming immune to the surroundings and circumstances. This is typically a state of Yogi or a Saint, who can go beyond any polarities of life.
But, How does one accept oneself amidst, all the environmental influences, chaos from home, school, society. Everyone is trying to rub their philosophy on you. They want you to be their way, They like u only if u do things their way. That is where all the toughness is, that is the BIGGEST BARRIER, It is like a huge pile of mountain and u need to melt that mountain to find your real self and then you get to accept yourself.
But how do you find your real self and face it.
The secret for this is "MEDITATION".
The people who are happy, are the ones, who accept themselves first. That does not mean that they are correct. Right or Wrong are relative. For Deer, A Lion is wrong. For a Lion, Elephant can be wrong. But whatever they are, they are all part of creation. The same creation created me, you, and them too. So No Questions about existence. It is the Law of Nature.
The moment we accept ourselves, we are at peace and the moment we are at peace, we smile at everything. But it is a very easy and hard journey. It takes time and effort. Search for happiness and peace is within, never outside. So, Change the Lens now.
Next article we shall see what truly is Meditation. Until then keep accepting yourself...and see the world through a new lens.
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